Life in a Box

Life in a Box: the Art of Living Dangerously

How far removed are you from your comfort zone?

By Barbara Rose

How often has it been said that in order to grow, particularly spiritually, you need to ‘move beyond your comfort zone’? The degree to which you can be seen to move is often used as a yardstick to determine your level of achievement and is indicative of how far you have progressed on your spiritual journey. If you succeed in changing your friends, family, or even your partner in a similar manner, then it further enhances your sense of spiritual achievement. For your outer life is simply a reflection of your inner reality, is it not?

Having spent several years immersing myself in spiritual courses and retreats avidly pushing the boundaries of my experience in order to demonstrate how well removed I was from my comfort zone, I came to realise this method – far from enhancing my spiritual growth – did not serve me very well at all! The further removed I was from my comfort zone the less ‘at home’ and comfortable I felt. Stepping back from this method of teaching and the consciousness of the group who promoted it enabled me to step in to my own truth and find clarity as to the reasons why this should be so.

The act of moving beyond my comfort zone involved my ignoring a fundamental aspect of my being – no wonder I felt I never belonged and certainly didn’t feel safe! How could I? I had split myself in two (or more) and was no longer complete. In moving beyond a place of relative safety before being ready to do so, and more importantly because that was the expectation of the group, was to suppress the very part of me that had put up the boundaries in the first place! And so, far from growing spiritually and transcending my coping mechanisms, I had instead been re-enforcing them! Denying my vulnerability; pushing on regardless; trying to be something I was not; and trying to achieve ultimate perfection in the process! Who was I trying to kid? And where did I go from here?

Quiet contemplation in nature brought forth many revelations and offered obvious answers to my dilemma. Does the oak uproot itself from the field, move to the riverbank, and seek to become the willow in order to grow? Would it cease to bear fruit if it didn’t even try? Would the rose be anything less than perfect if it was not also blessed with thorns? Nature, quite simply, does not seek to become that which it is not! The world would be a sad and boring place indeed, if it was composed entirely of oak trees or if every rose was without thorns holding the same fragrance and colour! Given the right conditions each plant, flower, shrub and tree will follow the rhythm of its own nature from seed to maturity, through flower and through fruit, until in the fullness of time it ceases to exist in that particular form. Why should we, as human beings, be any different?

If a plant is subject to excessive warmth or light it outgrows its strength; too much water, the roots cannot breathe and rot beneath the surface; too little, the plant withers and dies. Tender shoots require gentle balanced application of all that sustains it, in order to grow and flourish. Why should the human spirit be subject to anything less? Are we also not beings of nature? Or has our superior consciousness, our rise in technology, knowledge and understanding taken us beyond these fundamental universal laws?

In the light of this understanding, how does the human spirit ‘move beyond’ the comfort zone set in place by the fears and insecurities of the personality? Reflecting further on the examples evident in Mother Nature, the answer quite simply ‘is it does not!’ We are spiritual beings having a human experience and if we believe we have to move anywhere then we miss the point! How can we become, or how can we move to, that which we already are?

It is not a question of moving beyond your comfort zone, it is – quite simply – providing the right conditions for it to expand from within. As in the case of the tender young seedlings; if the personality is nurtured, loved and accepted as it is in each moment, it no longer resists and expansion of the comfort zone happens quite naturally; the boundaries and insecurities simply dissolve effortlessly as if they were never there in the first place. There is no question of force and no possibility of suppression. As the personality feels more ‘at home’ within itself the spirit or soul is able to shine through, as in the case of the plant producing flowers and bearing fruit; the personality thus becomes the servant of the soul.

The analogy of the ‘box’ illustrates fundamental truth underpinning these understandings. In sacred geometry, and many other spiritual traditions, the base chakra is represented by a cube. This chakra aligns to our first experience of life on planet earth in human form; it stores all our fears and insecurities relative to that experience and is also an expression of how comfortable and safe we feel in being here. As a new born child (extending roughly to the age of 8) we are still very much connected to our divine nature and our subsequent experiences will determine the degree to which we will maintain conscious awareness of this throughout life. The deeper our awareness is of this connection the more ‘at home’ we will feel within our physical body and with our life on this planet.

If we are nurtured, loved and accepted in our early years and not exposed to any situations that threaten our perceived survival then we will feel safe to explore our new world with relatively few obstacles to impede our growth. If, on the other hand, our trust in life is abused in any way (as is most often the case) then our fears will manifest in the form of barriers that serve to protect us yet also restrict our ability to experience life in a full and open way. Our life will be limited based upon the confines of ‘the box’ into which we have placed ourselves. Throughout life the inhibitions of this box will impede our experiences to ever increasing degrees until we eventually decide ‘enough is enough’ and seek to expand our boundaries along with the box!

Back to the cube! If a 3d cube is constructed using straws it is very unstable, almost impossible to maintain shape, and as soon as it is touched collapses in on itself; it needs something external to hold it up. Are you beginning to get the picture? The personality, living from the confines of the box, is no different. It continually seeks outside of itself for love, support and approval then when it fails to find it, or when that support is withdrawn, it collapses in on itself. A stronger, re-enforced box, is constructed and the saga continues; time after time after time! Until you, as a personality, cease to search outside of the box for support and love, it will always be so.

Returning once more to the insights gained through contemplating sacred geometry. The cube is stabilised by the star tetrahedron (a 3d six pointed star) – this shape when turned on its side is, in fact, a cube! – Again, it is a symbol found in many ancient teachings and sacred mandalas. Working with the qualities of this geometry through meditation and within your daily life refines the personality, thus stabilising the cube.

In order to understand how the six pointed star helps in this process we have to look at the basic building blocks held within its shape. A six pointed star is composed of two triangles one with the apex pointing up, the other pointing downwards in opposition to it; these two shapes symbolise spirit descending into matter (downward triangle) and man’s ascent towards spirit (upward triangle).

If we examine the components of a triangle we will see it to be composed of three straight lines; one at the base and two converging from either end to a single point at the apex. The base line symbolises the connection between two opposing poles (i.e. situation, object, self and other etc) with each converging line symbolising the path taken to reach resolution or union between these two opposites. In terms of human evolution it symbolises the transcendence of duality or separation consciousness into unity consciousness.

Refining of the personality requires the blending of all opposites, inner and outer, to create one unified whole. The more you accept each and every aspect of yourself, your life and all those who are a part of it, the more these opposing forces will come together in unity. When you come to realise you are loved and accepted as you are in each moment and, more to the point, that it is you who is generating this love, then spirit has truly descended into matter and you walk as a soul upon this earth. The boundaries of the box cease to be held in place by fear, instead becoming transparent, where the outer and the inner are one and the same. The personality is refined, the cube is stable and ‘life in a box’ becomes an ever increasing state of awareness with love and support emanating from within; the comfort zone has dissolved into union with All That Is!

The ‘Art of Living Dangerously’ lies in exploring your world in complete awareness of your limitations along with the boundaries of your box. In honouring and accepting your fallibilities and above all your vulnerability is to discover an inner strength leading you to exceed the limits of your comfort zone without ever having to leave it!